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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey dudes.

Well I know there’s a lot of threads already about this topic and I have read them all through 100 times over and still I am at a lost end.

Basically, my situation is this. I have met my boyfriend online and we have fallen in love, this is not something I ever expected or even believed could happen but it has. We are planning to meet for the first time in November and this may sound naïve but I know that our feelings for each other aren’t going to change because of this, not negatively anyway.

We have talked a lot about what will happen after we meet and the plan is that I would move to the US and we would get married. I know we haven’t even met yet but already I’m worried about us having to spend a lot of time apart. I have looked at the options for visas and the correct and legitimate way seems to be to apply for the K-1 fiancé visa and then get married within 90 days and apply for the I-130 (K2 Spouse visa) and the Adjustment of Status. However, I have seen that this can take up to 9 months!

I have also read a lot of stories about people who have gone to the US either on the Visa Waiver or the B2 tourist visa, got married and stayed and then just applied for the I-130. However, I understand this is not the legitimate way but yet it seems many people have been successful in this approach.

I really am just looking for some good advice or any real life stories of people who have had the same experience that I am currently going through. I hate the thought that we might not be able to be together for 9 months and am willing to do what it takes for us to be together, however I do not want to risk jeopardising my chances of been granted a green card etc.

Please help :(
 

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if you have never met you dont have a boyfriend...you have an on-line friend
nobody could really believe they want to marry somebody they never met

time to get real and smell the coffee

He may not be what you thing he is ....i.e. catfish

actually meet then we can put you on a path
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Well I did expect this kind of response but really it's not very helpful. I understand the risks and that I may be being naive as I said in my original post however you don't know me or him and cannot pass judgement on our relationship or situation. I may decide that I don't want to get married after we meet and it is possible he isn't who he says he is, however I am pretty sure he is and want to start planning for this, hence why I posted here, asking for advice not negative comments.
 

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Except that's USCIS's view in a nutshell. If you've never met face-to-face he cannot sponsor you for a K-1.

So, the process is to meet him, face to face, then leave the U.S. before your visa or visa waiver period expires. Do not overstay -- good advice regardless, but really good advice if you ever want to go back to the U.S.

If you both agree to marry after meeting, he can start the process for a K-1. Yes, it'll take some months. If the K-1 is approved you collect your K-1, go to the U.S., get married, file the additional paperwork with USCIS, and live happily ever after.

If you cannot bear to be apart he can come visit you. U.S. citizens are routinely granted 6 month stay permission when they enter the U.K., so, assuming you/he file the K-1 application correctly, assuming you qualify, and assuming USCIS responds within typical timeframes, you don't necessarily need to be apart very long.

Another option if you're in a hurry is to both go to, say, Denmark and get married. Then settle in any EU/EEA country except the U.K. You have the right to stay in any of those countries assuming you are economically self sufficient, and he has the right to stay because he's married to and co-resident with a U.K. citizen (who is an EU citizen). It's very easy to get married in Denmark, and he does not need a visa nor does he need to leave -- he can stay in Europe provided you get married to each other within his visa waiver stay period. (The U.K. is the exception. EU treaty provisions are more relaxed, but the U.K. demands more from its own citizens in the U.K.) You'll have the usual residence registration formalities in those EU/EEA countries, but as your legal co-resident spouse he has a treaty right to stay as long as you do absent something really weird like his torturing past and his outstanding Interpol warrant.

So, to sketch out that scenario, you can get married in Denmark -- Europe's Las Vegas for marriages, basically -- then settle in any EU/EEA country as long as you're economically self sufficient (and can prove it). You can live together practically anywhere in Europe for any length of time as a married couple. If at any time you want to both relocate to the U.S., he'd file an I-130 for you and start the process to get you into the U.S., also a multi-month process.

All of these paths require meeting face to face. Try that and see how it goes.
 

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BBC Watcher's advice is very good. Don't visit and get married in the US on the VWP and then overstay in the hope of converting your visa. There are reports of it working out for some people, but the US is extremely scrupulous about these marriages and will need a lot of proof to back up your claim that it was spontaneous (and since you're talking about it on a forum, it seems pretty premeditated). It's not the legal way and you're much more likely to have a bad result doing it than to wait the required amount of time for the K1.

I'm in a long distance relationship. We dated for 6 months while I was on a student visa and when it expired I went home. It's now been nearly a year of long distance. He came to stay with me in the states for 3 months, we've had gaps of a few months in between, and I am wrapping up a 3 month visit with him. The distance sucks and you deal with it the best you can and I always cry and feel miserable when we have to leave each other, but we are absolutely better off because of not rushing into getting married before we had lived together and really knew each other. We're just now starting to think about the K1 process, which will likely be another 8-10 month process.

It's just the way it is.
 
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