Serendipity2 -My answer to all of this ... is to sit down with your intended and, over time, lay out your financial abilities so that she is aware of what you can do and what you can't ... Again, he needs to be very open and honest about his financial abilities to his future bride
You are bringing up important topics, very much worth discussion and understanding.
Thank you for doing that, and I hope you will do more.
As I read those comments above something started to bother me.
Difficult to explain at first, because difficult to admit.
I'll do my best to try, and I welcome further discussion, too.
What bothers me is the premise, "open and honest".
The concept of honesty is not a high value in Thai culture.
Not at all.
So, if you claim to be open and honest, I am certain any Thai on the other side of that conversation will wonder, "What is he up to?"
After five years of observing Thais very carefully, I have decided to handle things very differently.
I watch how Thai men do things -- the senior men, my age, who have earned over the years, some respect in their family or their community.
I try to learn from them; why and how they do what they do.
I have never, ever, seen even one Thai man lay out his financial abilities in an open and honest manner.
I hope these comments will encourage further discussion of this topic.