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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My girlfriend and I are wanting to start our life together and have decided to get married. We have been in close communication now for nearly two years straight (we have not gone a single day without talking to one another, so it's quite serious).

My main concern, is about being her sponsor. We both have severe anxiety, which means that our lives are not typical to most. Neither of us have jobs currently and we both live with our parents. Even though I have no income, and I do not own a home, am I still able to become her sponsor? I do have a checking account. My parents are well off, and we were told that we are basically welcome to stay here for as long as we like. It's a large house.

I am also a bit lost and can use some advice on the correct steps to take. I have read good and bad things about getting married during a visiting visa. Is the deciding factor, a matter of having a lawyer to help you through the process after marrying during a visitor visa? We would like to avoid the long flights and multiple costly visits, especially since it is difficult for us both to get out in public. I just don't want to ruin her opportunity of receiving her green card. To be safe, I was going to look into the spouse visa route, but I have read from a few sources to avoid that due to the complications and time/money spent.

I have been doing a lot of research, but it seems the more I read the more confusing it gets. I could use some advice to get started. Thank you.
 

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first question would be ..have you actually met in person
And it not clear in which county you intend to settle
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
No, we have not met. Sorry for the confusion. I've asked this question on her behalf. She is from the UK and we are wanting to settle in the US with my parents, where I also live.
 

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No, we have not met. Sorry for the confusion. I've asked this question on her behalf. She is from the UK and we are wanting to settle in the US with my parents, where I also live.
Then you cannot go any further until you have actually met
wanting to marry a person you have not even met ..has to one of the dumbest decision ever..spend some time with each other please

The Us citizen has to be the main sponsor but they can have joint sponsors

Do not marry until you either get a fiancee or a spousal visa
 

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I would also say get to know each other first...
A person can be totally different to their online persona!:ranger:
For all you know....I could be an 18 year old girl, or a 60 year old transexual!!
An extreme example, maybe.....but marriage is a huge step!!

Also... in the eyes of the USCIS, you stand a much better chance of getting her immigration approved if you actually know each other!!!!!
 

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Marrying someone based on conversations is not a good idea. People are humans with needs and wants not voices or web cam pictures. Why does she not come to the US to spend a couple of weeks with you? Get to know each other. Find out if you are meant for each other. Just having the same medical issue does not make a match.
Ypour parents are well off. Great! Aside from living in their house - how will the two of you take care of things from driving to daily chores to paying for necessities. How will you handle things such as Social Security Office, drivers license, Green Card interviews? How do you plan to obtain medical insurance for the young lady? How will you introduce her to the US way of life, US food, social behavior?
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Thanks, I never really thought of it that way. I know that I may seem like some dumb/desperate guy, willing to marry someone who I haven't met in person yet, but believe it or not that isn't the case at all. I do agree that it is important to get to know someone in real time. I don't see it as the defining factor, but I'm willing to smile and nod, if that's what it takes.

Our relationship isn't just based on one thing in common. I wouldn't say it's "dumb" to make a hasty decision if you know people as well as I do. It could be just as dumb to assume, Oh internet person? That will never work.. when in fact the dumb decision could be walking away from a great opportunity and judging a book by it's cover.

Do you think any amount of time, longer than 60 days is acceptable to the USCIS or is there an ideal time frame? I hope years worth of visitations isn't expected from us. I'm probably more patient than most people, but time isn't exactly on our side. We have a late start on our lives as it is.
 

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Our relationship isn't just based on one thing in common. I wouldn't say it's "dumb" to make a hasty decision if you know people as well as I do. It could be just as dumb to assume, Oh internet person? That will never work.. when in fact the dumb decision could be walking away from a great opportunity and judging a book by it's cover.

Do you think any amount of time, longer than 60 days is acceptable to the USCIS or is there an ideal time frame? I hope years worth of visitations isn't expected from us. I'm probably more patient than most people, but time isn't exactly on our side. We have a late start on our lives as it is.
Hi James.
I don't think anyone is describing YOU as dumb, merely teh plan you have is questionable, an dwon't work.

I met my fiance on a social networking site, completely by accident, and spoke for a year before we finally met. I have now been there for 6 weeks, and she has been here twice, for 6 weeks and 6 months.

Only now are we CERTAIN that we want to get married, as meeting is VERY different from the internet. If you intend to live in the states, visit it. It is VERY different from the UK in many ways. Some you will like, some you won't, but you MUST have enoughy information to make an informed choice, not only about your fiance, but about making a life for youself in the states.

I am NOT making value judgements here, but i find the states a wonderful place, and suites me and my personality very closely (i think lol), but it is not as cosseted an environment as it is in the UK, is that somethign you are prepared for?

Notwithstanding the fact that to be eligible (as I understand it) you HAVE to have met to be eligible for a K1 visa, please take into account my comments above. I can be an old romantic aswell, but to leap into a marraige from several 1000 miles away, in a country you have never experienced would be sheer folly.

Believe me, i understand your feelings and motivations, but, there is no way around the reqiurements, you HAVE to jump through the right hoops in the right order at the right time.

Probably not what you want to here, but that is reality :)
 

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What raceman said.

You don't need years and years of visits, but you do need to have proof of having met at least a couple of times. This from the CIS pages on fiancé visas:

If you petition for a fiancé(e) visa, you must show that:
...
You met each other, in person, at least once within 2 years of filing your petition. There are two exceptions that require a waiver:
1. If the requirement to meet would violate strict and long-established customs of your or your fiancé(e)’s foreign culture or social practice.
2. If you prove that the requirement to meet would result in extreme hardship to you.
It's nothing directed against you and your intended. There are really horrible stories of "mail-order" brides and arranged marriages gone terribly wrong or done strictly to enable a foreigner to get a green card they weren't otherwise entitled to. Play the game by the rules and things will go much smoother for everyone involved.
Cheers,
Bev
 
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