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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey guys, I don't live in the UAE, but rather in a western country. My gf is an emirati girl from Dubai, im crazy about this girl! and i know all the restrictions that happen in the gulf. I've done my research, i just want to know what are my chances of marrying this girl! She is going to ask her mum that i'm interested in the next few days as she is on a Uni break. (she is from a mixed marriage herself, her dad is a local but her mother is from the gulf).

I am muslim and an Iraqi, but pretty much have lived all my life in a western country.

I would really appreciate any advice or if anyone has gone through the same experience or has a friend who has. I'm crazy about this girl! I just want to know where i stand

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It all depends on her parents and if they approve. It doesn't really matter what we say here or how crazy you are about the girl, if her parents do not approve, then it's the end of this love story....unless, she runs away to be with you. Then its your head on a platter :D
 

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Possibly, however on the off chance that it's genuine - my personal advice is weigh up all your options and wait to see what the parents have to say. At the end of the day it's up to the guy and girl how much they respect their parents wishes but they shouldn't confuse culture with religion. You ARE allowed to chose your own partner, arranged marriages are cultural. It is always best though if the parents agree :rolleyes: makes everyones lives happier :D
 

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No - as a Muslim woman - I don't agree with a Muslim woman marrying a non Muslim man :rolleyes: However sometimes you have to accept born Muslims haven't chosen their faith a may decide as adults that they don't actually believe. In this case they are no longer classed as Muslims anyway.

When I say you can chose your partner I obviously mean another believer, for a woman the only option is another Muslim.

As the poster quite clearly claims to be Muslim and the chances are high that the girl is too being a local, then their is a matter of choice in this instance.

You CAN decide who you want to marry. There is heavy emphasis on pleasing your parents but it is not meant to the extent that you never live any part of your own life, make your own decisions etc. You are perfectly within your rights to go against your parents wishes if they do not have a valid, justifiable reason for what they are saying or if it is against Islam. A lot of people don't because it can cause friction within the family...but they DO have that option :)
 

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You will need lots and lots of money and will be expected to give her the lifestyle she is either accustomed to, or the one she wants - either way its going to be very very expensive!!!!
 

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Just go to Vegas man, e-mail her mum a pic of you dressed as Elvis taking her up the aisle (in the church that is, not in the honeymoon suite afterwards).

Ain't a damn thing she'll be able to do about it. Well, I guess she could have you killed or something, but then who doesn't love a Romeo & Juliet tale of tragic love?

You know it makes sense!
 

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Bit harsh. Not all locals are rich. A great deal of them, once you get outside of dubai and abu dhabi, are actually not so well off or materialistic as so many seem to think.

The bit about referring to this person as your gf, already doesnt sound good. I havent met any local family who allows their sisters/daughters to have bfs, at least, not in the open.

I assume undisclosed knows that by marrying an outsider, her children will have no rights in the uae for citizenship. If you were to get a divorce later on, being a muslim, you know she would most likely come back home. Her children would not be provided educations, healthcare, or anything. A mixed marriage in the uae is quite different when discussing men and women. Men do it all the time. Women hardly ever do it.

I do have a friend whose sister has married a bahrain man. It happens but you better be a devout muslim, have a local mosque full of fellow friends who are willing to vouch for your character, and be able to provide a good life for their daughter. If they are a well off family though, probly none of that will matter. Family name matters more ;)

I would assume you have discussed this and you know the answer already that her parents are not going to approve and that is why you are asking. If her parents say no, its not going to happen.
 

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Those living "outside" Abu Dhabi and Dubai are basically "bedouin" and very traditional. She wouldn't even think about having a "relationship" of any sort with a male, especially on the internet.
 

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Well then all my local friends are bedouins :) And the one bedouin my Al Ain 'bedouin' friend introduced me to, well.. he is REALLY bedouin.

(RAK locaks, sharjah locals, ajman local, al ain locals are not bedoins at all is my point)
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
She's not from those outer places, shes from dubai. And shes been living overseas for a number of years now. I'm pretty much her first like proper relationship so to speak.
Her dad is verrrrrrry strict and i'm thinking if anything he will be the one to say no.

I love this girl so much, but like you said in above posts i'm sort of prepping myself for a no but hoping that some 1 in a million chance comes through and it says yes.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Bit harsh. Not all locals are rich. A great deal of them, once you get outside of dubai and abu dhabi, are actually not so well off or materialistic as so many seem to think.

The bit about referring to this person as your gf, already doesnt sound good. I havent met any local family who allows their sisters/daughters to have bfs, at least, not in the open.

I assume undisclosed knows that by marrying an outsider, her children will have no rights in the uae for citizenship. If you were to get a divorce later on, being a muslim, you know she would most likely come back home. Her children would not be provided educations, healthcare, or anything. A mixed marriage in the uae is quite different when discussing men and women. Men do it all the time. Women hardly ever do it.

I do have a friend whose sister has married a bahrain man. It happens but you better be a devout muslim, have a local mosque full of fellow friends who are willing to vouch for your character, and be able to provide a good life for their daughter. If they are a well off family though, probly none of that will matter. Family name matters more ;)

I would assume you have discussed this and you know the answer already that her parents are not going to approve and that is why you are asking. If her parents say no, its not going to happen.
I understand what your saying, but like i mentioned she is of a mixed marriage!! her mum is not a local, but from another country from the gulf. And i know that one of her sisters is not married to a local! But hes from the gulf aswell.

I think it will be very hard for me because firstly i dont live in the middle east. I love the country that i live in right now and prefer it over ANYTHING. But for her, i would move. And to be honest with you i don't think she can hack living in the UAE for a year max, shes been living out of the country for so long now that i can say shes even more westernised than me in some aspects!!!!

I guess i'll just have to wait and see, i really hope its a yes/maybe but i know its 99.99% chance it will be a no, but as she is from a mixed marriage you never know.
 

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No - as a Muslim woman - I don't agree with a Muslim woman marrying a non Muslim man :rolleyes: However sometimes you have to accept born Muslims haven't chosen their faith a may decide as adults that they don't actually believe. In this case they are no longer classed as Muslims anyway.

When I say you can chose your partner I obviously mean another believer, for a woman the only option is another Muslim.
You just contradicted yourself. It seems that women 'DO NOT' have ANY options! Why is it that you would allow the man to choose to marry the person of his choice cross spanning religions but not the woman?
 

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No - as a Muslim woman - I don't agree with a Muslim woman marrying a non Muslim man :rolleyes: However sometimes you have to accept born Muslims haven't chosen their faith a may decide as adults that they don't actually believe. In this case they are no longer classed as Muslims anyway.
I second Rutilius's question above this post of mine but also want to highlight to you Shahzadee, that no baby is BORN a muslim or a catholic or a hindu. Children have religion forced down their throats because that is what their parents believe in. How on earth are you born a muslim?
 

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Anonymous is probly dead in the water anyhow... She is a dubai local.

Pammy & Ruttilus, we may not agree with it but it is how it is. To not raise your child as a muslim in the middle east if the man is muslim, means the child would face certain death if he/she was to say they were not a muslim when they get older and wanted to continue living as adults in the middle east. If a family is mixed and wishes to do that, best to go to their non middle east country, have the child and give the child a non muslim name, not move back to the middle east, and never apply for a birth certificate in the islamic country. My understanding is they will not allow a nonislamic name to be given to a child born of muslim parents and you will have to 'fix' the name to a muslim name at that time anyhow, identifying the child as muslim. Have had this kid naming discussion....

These things aint right to most people from the western world, but it is all part of their religion and it aint going anywhere anytime soon!
 
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According to the koran, EVERYONE is born a muslim, that's you, me, pam, jinxy, everyone. It's because we're infidels that we didn't take up the religion fully.
 
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