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Hi

I'm new to this expat forum thing and not sure how it works.... but.... I've been living in Italy for 2 years now with my 13 year old daughter. It's been tough on us both, but finally things have turned a corner for her and she is totally fluent, thriving at school and her social life is just starting to flourish. Since we arrived, I have concentrated on her and my needs have been put on hold. Now that she doesn't need me so much, I am disallusioned to realise that I am no further forward than when I first arrived. My Italian is still rubbish, I have made no friends, and quiet frankly I'm bored and lonely. I've done my best to find a job but work is scarce here even for the Italians. Now I'm trying to find unpaid work just so that I can mix with people and learn the language and I've even approached the local dog rescue place and been turned down as a volunteer!

I'm not about to chuck it all in and retreat back to the UK now things have finally started working out for my daughter, but I really need somebody to talk to!!! My confidence has dipped so low that I find I hardly want to get out of bed in the mornings. The less you do, the less you want to do..... I did join a yoga class for a few months, but it was expensive and although things aren't that difficult financially, it seemed a bit of a luxury so I bought a dvd from Amazon instead! Sometimes I find I can go for a week or 10 days without speaking to another soul.... my daughter usually has IPod earphones plugged in all the time and sniggers at my attempts to speak Italian... My man works away for 2 or 3 months at a time to finance the building of our dream house here so I really am all alone most of the time, and he can't understand what I've got to complain about.

About me.... I'm late 40s but feel as if I'm much younger!!! I'm interested in cooking, gardening, shopping, dogs, cats and horses and have two children but the oldest at 28 is still in London.

If there is anyone out there near Canelli/Asti/Alba/Aqui Terme please get in touch and save my sanity.... otherwise, I'm very grateful to any suggestions and words of wisdom from anyone elsewhere.......
 

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Hi and welcome to the forum.

Lots keep saying they want to meet up and have coffee with someone.

It just needs someone to say... I will be at such and such coffee house at 11 am on the 12th never.. hope someone can come along and say hello


keep posting in the forum as it helps your post to get hit

maiden
 

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If you have access to Torino, you could try contacting the International Women's Club of Torino: IWCT - Website They are into networking - and have an international base of members. Definitely worth a look-see.
Cheers,
Bev
 

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Hi reading your message I almost feel I have written it, I feel the same,been in Italy for 5 yrs still can't speak the language as I seem to be confined to the house most days, I think sometimes i'm going crazy when i'm talking to my dog & 2 guinea pigs haha, I love animals.
I'm living in Liguria 5 mins from the sea i'm early 30's no children, I don't know what to suggest but I understand exactly how you feel.Where about's in the UK are you from?Hope to you hear from you soon Sara
 

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Hi Sara

Great to hear from you. Is that my prognosis? 5 years and things will still be the same?!! No!!! I came here from Caterham/Purley in Surrey (near Croydon) to give my daughter a better life and education - and I thought it would be better for me too,

What about you? Where are you from? And how far are you from Savona or Genova? I'm about and hour and a bit north from both... Amanda x
 

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Hi Sara

Great to hear from you. Is that my prognosis? 5 years and things will still be the same?!! No!!! I came here from Caterham/Purley in Surrey (near Croydon) to give my daughter a better life and education - and I thought it would be better for me too,

What about you? Where are you from? And how far are you from Savona or Genova? I'm about and hour and a bit north from both... Amanda x
Hi Amanda ,I'm from Manchester & came here to live with my boyfiend,I'd had enough of the UK I knew Imperia wasn't very exciting before I came but made the switch anyway,I'm about 1 hr from Savona.
God no I hope you don't feel the same in another 3 yrs, I think even if you had a couple of friends just to go out with doing normal things that would make a big difference but what do you do go upto everybody in the street and say do u speak English ,it frustrates me very much that I'm not fluent in the Italian language having to rely on other people to do things for you I mean I can do most of the day to day things not a problem but it would be nice to speak to the locals now and again...What is it like where you live is it quiet or busy town near by?Sara
 

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Discussion Starter #7
Hi Sara

Have looked Imperia up on the map and I'm ashamed not to know where it is cos I drive past it quite often. Should have been passing today as we were supposed to be picking up our new car from Monaco but the guy that was coming to pick us up to take us there has let us down. Next weekend instead now. It's not too far for us to meet up. Last summer we did a few day trips to Alassio during the holidays, so maybe we could meet in the summer when the weather is a bit warmer?

I'm in a small town in winegrowing country. It's very much an agricultural community and everybody knows everybody else. The locals are very nice and I can go into town and ten people will say hello, but they are just acquaintances or people I see around all the time. I'm quite shy so I find it hard to make the first move, and the Italians are very family focussed and have no need or desire to let anyone it to their circle.

Like you, I can get by in shops and restaurants, and have someone that helps with telephone calls and paperwork, but my Italian isn't improving cos I don't get much opportunity to talk with anyone.

Still.... the sun is shining today and the sky is so blue and that always lifts my spirits, as does taking the dog out for a walk through the vineyards. I've got a golden retriever - did you say that you had a dog? What have you got? Bonny will be 2 in May and is awfully badly behaved - doesn't take a blind bit of notice of anything I say - bit like my daughter!!

Gotta go now - have promised my daughter a couple of hours window shopping in Alessandria. Maybe talk later? Have a nice day and enjoy the sunshine!
 

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Hi Amanda, How was your day?if you prefer you can send me your email address? Speak to you soon Sara x
 

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Hi Sara

Had a good day thanks. We went to this supermarket that's about 40 minutes away and has a few nice shops in the complex. Don't know about what it's like your way, but shopping here is so limited - all the supermarkets where I am sell exactly the same stuff and sometimes you have to go a bit further to get things you take for granted in the UK, like smoked mackerel and brown sugar... We didn't buy much - my daughter is almost 14 and has just realised she likes clothes shopping, and she is obsessed with nail varnish so we bought her a t-shirt and some nail varnish and we spent a long time just looking and trying things on, then had some pizza and an icecream, did the food shopping in the supermarket and drove back.

Now we're just settling down in front of Harry Hill and Take Me Out. I've opened a bottle of red wine and lit some candles.... and will probably fall asleep as soon as I sit on the sofa!

What about your day? What did you do? I'm not sure what we do about exchanging e mail addresses as I thought it wasn't allowed. I only joined this forum yesterday and am not sure how things are done?? - I know I can't personal message anyone yet... Amanda x
 

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Hi Sara

Had a good day thanks. We went to this supermarket that's about 40 minutes away and has a few nice shops in the complex. Don't know about what it's like your way, but shopping here is so limited - all the supermarkets where I am sell exactly the same stuff and sometimes you have to go a bit further to get things you take for granted in the UK, like smoked mackerel and brown sugar... We didn't buy much - my daughter is almost 14 and has just realised she likes clothes shopping, and she is obsessed with nail varnish so we bought her a t-shirt and some nail varnish and we spent a long time just looking and trying things on, then had some pizza and an icecream, did the food shopping in the supermarket and drove back.

Now we're just settling down in front of Harry Hill and Take Me Out. I've opened a bottle of red wine and lit some candles.... and will probably fall asleep as soon as I sit on the sofa!

What about your day? What did you do? I'm not sure what we do about exchanging e mail addresses as I thought it wasn't allowed. I only joined this forum yesterday and am not sure how things are done?? - I know I can't personal message anyone yet... Amanda x
Aaahh I see what you mean about the email address ,they remove it & they says it's 5 posts for private mes, well it sounds like you had a nice day,getting out the house makes us feel normal haha I used to love shopping especially fro clothes but that has long gone out of my life ,one advantage of living in Imperia is you don't spend any money because there is nothing to spend it on,sometimes I take trips out to Nice in France for a nosey I actualy prefer France.
I just took my dog out to the beach today when food shopping also,my dog is a boxer & she is 11 yrs old she's not in the best of shape at the moment which makes me sad . I agree when the sun is shining it almost feels like you don't have any troubles & me too will be watching English tv I never watch Italian sky ,sat nights on UK sky are not so great at the moment .. Sure we can meet up speak to you soon enjoy your evening Sara x
 

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hi there !! i am only 21 .. but i have moved to piemonte last week and if your wanting some company reguardless of age and would like to meet up just post a message on here to me ! there can only be more people that just you like this so im sure more people will post back to you ! also i know the family i am living with has an english teacher aswell who is mid fourties maybe fifties .. i suppose after ive met her a couple of times i can pass your nuber on to hher? im sure she is from liverpool originally ! im also starting italian courses tomorrow in via san secondo the group is called YWCA and the enrollment fee is like 15 euros for the year im sure why dont you come along , maybe i can meet you somewhere for coffee before ? x
 

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ohh i have no idea where that is !! i live near via galleleo ferraris , is this close to you ?! im free usually from about 10-4pm but tomorrow i have the italian class and then im busy at 1 o'clock ish ! but most other days im fine to do .. and any time after about 8-9 pm :) x
 

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Oh no you're actually in Torino? That's more than an hour away in the car for me!!! Shame, cos I'd like to do a language course!!! x
 

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have you searched for any in your area ? there has to be some people who speak english , what about the english teacher at your daughters school? maybe she has some friends , find out at the next parents evening :) aww thats a shame! bbut still when im free on the weekend we should definatly arrange to do something :)xx
 

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Hi

I'm new to this expat forum thing and not sure how it works.... but.... I've been living in Italy for 2 years now with my 13 year old daughter. It's been tough on us both, but finally things have turned a corner for her and she is totally fluent, thriving at school and her social life is just starting to flourish. Since we arrived, I have concentrated on her and my needs have been put on hold. Now that she doesn't need me so much, I am disallusioned to realise that I am no further forward than when I first arrived. My Italian is still rubbish, I have made no friends, and quiet frankly I'm bored and lonely. I've done my best to find a job but work is scarce here even for the Italians. Now I'm trying to find unpaid work just so that I can mix with people and learn the language and I've even approached the local dog rescue place and been turned down as a volunteer!

I'm not about to chuck it all in and retreat back to the UK now things have finally started working out for my daughter, but I really need somebody to talk to!!! My confidence has dipped so low that I find I hardly want to get out of bed in the mornings. The less you do, the less you want to do..... I did join a yoga class for a few months, but it was expensive and although things aren't that difficult financially, it seemed a bit of a luxury so I bought a dvd from Amazon instead! Sometimes I find I can go for a week or 10 days without speaking to another soul.... my daughter usually has IPod earphones plugged in all the time and sniggers at my attempts to speak Italian... My man works away for 2 or 3 months at a time to finance the building of our dream house here so I really am all alone most of the time, and he can't understand what I've got to complain about.

About me.... I'm late 40s but feel as if I'm much younger!!! I'm interested in cooking, gardening, shopping, dogs, cats and horses and have two children but the oldest at 28 is still in London.

If there is anyone out there near Canelli/Asti/Alba/Aqui Terme please get in touch and save my sanity.... otherwise, I'm very grateful to any suggestions and words of wisdom from anyone elsewhere.......
hello my name is patricia and we have a holiday home in sessame which is only
a few miles from you i will be starting to come over to italy in april we can arrange
to meet for coffee in nizza if you want .
 

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Discussion Starter #17
Hi Patricia!

That would be great - my daughter is at school in Nizza at La Madonna. Sessame..... is that between Nizza and Acqui Terme? I know I drive through it sometimes but can't picture it....

Are you in the UK at the moment and if so whereabouts?

Amanda
 

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Hello

Hi

I'm new to this expat forum thing and not sure how it works.... but.... I've been living in Italy for 2 years now with my 13 year old daughter. It's been tough on us both, but finally things have turned a corner for her and she is totally fluent, thriving at school and her social life is just starting to flourish. Since we arrived, I have concentrated on her and my needs have been put on hold. Now that she doesn't need me so much, I am disallusioned to realise that I am no further forward than when I first arrived. My Italian is still rubbish, I have made no friends, and quiet frankly I'm bored and lonely. I've done my best to find a job but work is scarce here even for the Italians. Now I'm trying to find unpaid work just so that I can mix with people and learn the language and I've even approached the local dog rescue place and been turned down as a volunteer!

I'm not about to chuck it all in and retreat back to the UK now things have finally started working out for my daughter, but I really need somebody to talk to!!! My confidence has dipped so low that I find I hardly want to get out of bed in the mornings. The less you do, the less you want to do..... I did join a yoga class for a few months, but it was expensive and although things aren't that difficult financially, it seemed a bit of a luxury so I bought a dvd from Amazon instead! Sometimes I find I can go for a week or 10 days without speaking to another soul.... my daughter usually has IPod earphones plugged in all the time and sniggers at my attempts to speak Italian... My man works away for 2 or 3 months at a time to finance the building of our dream house here so I really am all alone most of the time, and he can't understand what I've got to complain about.

About me.... I'm late 40s but feel as if I'm much younger!!! I'm interested in cooking, gardening, shopping, dogs, cats and horses and have two children but the oldest at 28 is still in London.

If there is anyone out there near Canelli/Asti/Alba/Aqui Terme please get in touch and save my sanity.... otherwise, I'm very grateful to any suggestions and words of wisdom from anyone elsewhere.......
Hello, there, Twinkle Canelli,
I would love to save your sanity. I have a feeling that in writing your message, you will receive many many helpful replies. You will find that the people who subscribe to this forum are very friendly and understand much of what you have said.

My name is MaryAnn and my husband and I live permanently in Praia A Mare, Calabria. I am of Sicilian background, having lived with my Italian born relatives, all grandparents, in the same 3 floor building when I grew up. We moved here, in the South, in October, 2010, from the United States...NY State to be exact. Our town is 5 hours south of Rome, by train, about 3 hours south of Naples. We are here because Italy simply called out to me and I needed to be at my origin, especially since my parents died in 2005 and 2006. I was the only child.

We love dogs, also. We have brought our 2 Golden Retrievers over from the States. There is so much to do, Twinkle; Lots of fun things, and there is a great need of dog rescue. I am surprised you were turned down. There are tons of strays here.

Please write back if you feel like it, ok?

Thanks, and try to have a good day. I know it is hard at times, but there are ways to help. Be well.

MaryAnn
 

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Twinkle,
You'd do well to improve your Italian, but you need to get out and about to do that. If I were you, I'd start teaching English just to have some contact. You don't have to be a teacher per se; you could start like I did, by doing conversation with adults or helping students with their English homework. And if you're lucky like I was, this thing will snowball. I'm now at the point that I'm refusing teaching work. Get your daughter to help you write an advert. Hard copies can be posted in supermarkets, dry cleaners, stationery stores, etc. You can place an ad on a web site like kijiji.it.
If you live near a major city (like Torino) there are expat organizations, but I would recommend against surrounding yourself only with English-speaking people 'cause you need to integrate.

Ed

Hi

I'm new to this expat forum thing and not sure how it works.... but.... I've been living in Italy for 2 years now with my 13 year old daughter. It's been tough on us both, but finally things have turned a corner for her and she is totally fluent, thriving at school and her social life is just starting to flourish. Since we arrived, I have concentrated on her and my needs have been put on hold. Now that she doesn't need me so much, I am disallusioned to realise that I am no further forward than when I first arrived. My Italian is still rubbish, I have made no friends, and quiet frankly I'm bored and lonely. I've done my best to find a job but work is scarce here even for the Italians. Now I'm trying to find unpaid work just so that I can mix with people and learn the language and I've even approached the local dog rescue place and been turned down as a volunteer!

I'm not about to chuck it all in and retreat back to the UK now things have finally started working out for my daughter, but I really need somebody to talk to!!! My confidence has dipped so low that I find I hardly want to get out of bed in the mornings. The less you do, the less you want to do..... I did join a yoga class for a few months, but it was expensive and although things aren't that difficult financially, it seemed a bit of a luxury so I bought a dvd from Amazon instead! Sometimes I find I can go for a week or 10 days without speaking to another soul.... my daughter usually has IPod earphones plugged in all the time and sniggers at my attempts to speak Italian... My man works away for 2 or 3 months at a time to finance the building of our dream house here so I really am all alone most of the time, and he can't understand what I've got to complain about.

About me.... I'm late 40s but feel as if I'm much younger!!! I'm interested in cooking, gardening, shopping, dogs, cats and horses and have two children but the oldest at 28 is still in London.

If there is anyone out there near Canelli/Asti/Alba/Aqui Terme please get in touch and save my sanity.... otherwise, I'm very grateful to any suggestions and words of wisdom from anyone elsewhere.......
 

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Discussion Starter #20
Thanks MaryAnn,

I have been emotionally uplifted by all the lovely words of wisdom and encouragement.... I too have a golden retriever - she's Italian born, and will be 2 in May. Crazy as anything - still an overgrown puppy - we've just come back from walking round the flood plains and she went mad through the puddles and then rolled about in the mud. We're confined to the kitchen now until she's dry and I can brush it all out! I'll keep trying with the animal rescue places here - the one nearest me is funded by the comune and they only want volunteers for walking the dogs in the afternoons, but I am only free in the mornings! I'm not fussed what animals I'm helping so I'm going to try cats next - I just need to be needed!!!

I do love it here in a lot of ways - I'm always busy - I just get lonely and miss the girly chats and laughter that I used to share with the friends and family I had in England. I don't seem to have much in common with them now. I really am very fortunate - I just have to keep remembering that!

When our house is built we plan to have chickens and maybe a donkey and my man will retire and everything will be wonderful. I just need to build myself a satisfactory life until that happens... I was a very independent career woman in London and since I came here I seem to have lost my identity, which in turn has sapped my confidence. I just need to find it again!!!

And Ed, you are absolutely right - I think that offering help with English may be the only thing there is a market for here, although opportunities will be somewhat limited as I live in quite a small town and very few people speak any English at all, apart from the school children. Such is my lack of confidence at the moment that the thought of teaching anyone anything absolutely terrifies me. I might browse the net and see if there are any suggested lesson plans that would give a good basis to start from as I just wouldn't know where to start teaching someone a foreign language. I also need to improve my Italian so that I can communicate with them!
 
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