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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
As you may have read, I loved San Miguel, my wife didn't. Her main complaints were walking on cobblestone streets with narrow sidewalks, and the lack of stores to shop in. She actually has bad knees so can't blame her for the streets. But she dearly missed the huge choice she was used to at home. She loves to shop, but before you get the wrong idea she's really into thrift stores and loves spending hours finding a jewel in the rough. But she also loves having the huge amount of choice available in the States.

Now I know that's anathema to some here. You may have come to Mexico to get away from the commercialism. But I'm trying to find a compromise. We had heard good things about Queretaro but were overwhelmed by the traffic there. So my question is, are there cities in Mexico that have good shopping, good weather, reasonable traffic, and are affordable? I've read Puebla has a large middle class so might try to steer her that direction. We just don't want the frenetic pace we saw in Queretaro which was otherwise a fine looking city. She's saying we can come back as soon as our old dogs pass away, which may be 4 or 5 years. There were apartments we liked on the Internet that didn't allow dogs. I know Guadalajara has it all, was wondering about Tlaquepaque? Thanks for any help!
 

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I could think about some places; Puebla, once again Queretaro, Guadalajara, Zapopan, etc.
They all are great cities, but they all have narrow streets, and some other problems, including the lack of all the choices your wife likes.
I'm sorry to say this, but in 4 to 5 more years cobble stones may seem bigger than now
Dogs also get older here in Mexico you know?

Anyway, if you really would like to convince your wife of coming here, in spite of her list of "different than the US", I suggest for you guys to start learning Spanish, it will make a great difference whenever you come again.

Hope I wrote something helpful
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I could think about some places; Puebla, once again Queretaro, Guadalajara, Zapopan, etc.
They all are great cities, but they all have narrow streets, and some other problems, including the lack of all the choices your wife likes.
I'm sorry to say this, but in 4 to 5 more years cobble stones may seem bigger than now
Dogs also get older here in Mexico you know?

Anyway, if you really would like to convince your wife of coming here, in spite of her list of "different than the US", I suggest for you guys to start learning Spanish, it will make a great difference whenever you come again.

Hope I wrote something helpful
Thanks Gary, very helpful. The thing is we're moving into my mom's house in the country outside of the vast metropolis of Kinston, NC. A few years of that and Mexico will look much better to her I'm betting!
 

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Thanks Gary, very helpful. The thing is we're moving into my mom's house in the country outside of the vast metropolis of Kinston, NC. A few years of that and Mexico will look much better to her I'm betting!
Sounds like you do have a plan now!
 

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vantexan ... Mexico, obviously ... isn't the location for you to live. Give it up. Look elsewhere. Or, find another woman to live with. Those are your choices.
I would like to soften Longford's comments a little. Another choice is to encourage your wife to look at a move to Mexico as a way to open her world to activities that go beyond shopping, though I will admit that shopping in traditional Mexican markets and tianguis give me a lot of pleasure!
 

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Vantexan:

I suggest Metropolitan Guadalajara, which includes Zapopan, Tlaquepaque and lots of other places I won´t even start to go into and where there is fabulous shopping from expensive to discount stores of all kinds. It is the city you seek in Mexico. Forget Puebla which can´t hold a candle to Guadalajara for what you and your wife are seeking and, believe me, I know both cities. Rural North Carolina living with my mama (if she were still with us on the planet) would drive me insane and I say that as a rural Alabama boy. Get out of there ASAP.
 

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Thanks Gary, very helpful. The thing is we're moving into my mom's house in the country outside of the vast metropolis of Kinston, NC. A few years of that and Mexico will look much better to her I'm betting!
I was just telling someone the other day that Kinston has to be one of the most miserable places in all the USA. Perhaps the only place worse is Wilson or Goldsboro. Anyway, be very careful there also this is one dangerous drug infested town. There are plenty of neighborhoods you do NOT want to go once the sun goes down or even in broad daylight for that matter.

Last reports from 2011, from what I have heard, it has only gotten worse the last couple of years.

50 murders per 100K persons. What is it in Juarez?

Crime rate in Kinston, North Carolina (NC): murders, rapes, robberies, assaults, burglaries, thefts, auto thefts, arson, law enforcement employees, police officers statistics

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I was just telling someone the other day that Kinston has to be one of the most miserable places in all the USA. Perhaps the only place worse is Wilson or Goldsboro. Anyway, be very careful there also this is one dangerous drug infested town. There are plenty of neighborhoods you do NOT want to go once the sun goes down or even in broad daylight for that matter.

Last reports from 2011, from what I have heard, it has only gotten worse the last couple of years.

50 murders per 100K persons. What is it in Juarez?

Crime rate in Kinston, North Carolina (NC): murders, rapes, robberies, assaults, burglaries, thefts, auto thefts, arson, law enforcement employees, police officers statistics


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You definitely know the area, LOL.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Vantexan:

I suggest Metropolitan Guadalajara, which includes Zapopan, Tlaquepaque and lots of other places I won´t even start to go into and where there is fabulous shopping from expensive to discount stores of all kinds. It is the city you seek in Mexico. Forget Puebla which can´t hold a candle to Guadalajara for what you and your wife are seeking and, believe me, I know both cities. Rural North Carolina living with my mama (if she were still with us on the planet) would drive me insane and I say that as a rural Alabama boy. Get out of there ASAP.
I suspect you are right but I've always liked Puebla for some reason. I think the ultimate for us would be to live in Ajijic or nearby and drive into Guadalajara on occasion.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
I would like to soften Longford's comments a little. Another choice is to encourage your wife to look at a move to Mexico as a way to open her world to activities that go beyond shopping, though I will admit that shopping in traditional Mexican markets and tianguis give me a lot of pleasure!
I find the history and cultures of Mexico fascinating. To see where Father Miguel Hildalgo proclaimed the famous Grito in Dolores Hidalgo meant alot to me. Talked her into detouring to Real de Catorce on the way home. I loved the atmosphere. She loved the many booths of souvenirs to go through. We both loved the big Tuesday tiangui in San Miguel. But it's not enough for her. Playa del Carmen appeals for both the beach and the American style amenities. But she only wants to be there in the winter. Maybe Guadalajara with occasional trips to Puerto Vallarta is the way to go.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
vantexan ... Mexico, obviously ... isn't the location for you to live. Give it up. Look elsewhere. Or, find another woman to live with. Those are your choices.
Waited until 51 to get married. Married a girl who went through hell with her first husband and never gave up trying to find me decades after we met in college. Sorry, not that casual about changing relationships.
 

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Forget Mexico. The large cities have shopping centers similar to the States but usually more expensive and less choice. The traffic in larger cities in and around centro is usually heavy. If you guys think the traffic in Queretaro is bad you are not ready for Puebla, Oaxaca or Guadalaja or Mexico City and so on..

Give it up Mexico is not the US. After a few years here I get overwhelmed by the choices in Europe and the US but to tell you the truth when you are retired you have acquired all the junk you can take and it is time to take another hobby especially if you are on a tight budget.

We have been living here for 13 years and we have never had to shop for anything in the States we could not find here if we put our mind to it.
Many people complain they cannot find this or that but if you really are looking you probably will find it.

You guys did not give Mexico a chance, it is obvious that if you ever move to Mexico you should look at a place like Chapala where they are many foreigners and many shops and where it is easier to find US items. (By the way some of the villages have cobblestones as well and so do many quaint places in Europe so stay in the US)

You may think you would like Mexico but really you are looking at the wrong country. Find a place in the States where you and take short vacations to Mexico.
 

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Tlaquepaque has a few blocks of high end furniture and folk art type of stores and the rest is just like any other city, traffic narrow sidewalks and so on.

She may like some of the shopping center in Guadalajara but the nice ones are usually in the hiher priced districts and if she does not like the traffic in Queretaro she sure will not like the traffic in Guadalajara.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Forget Mexico. The large cities have shopping centers similar to the States but usually more expensive and less choice. The traffic in larger cities in and around centro is usually heavy. If you guys think the traffic in Queretaro is bad you are not ready for Puebla, Oaxaca or Guadalaja or Mexico City and so on..

Give it up Mexico is not the US. After a few years here I get overwhelmed by the choices in Europe and the US but to tell you the truth when you are retired you have acquired all the junk you can take and it is time to take another hobby especially if you are on a tight budget.

We have been living here for 13 years and we have never had to shop for anything in the States we could not find here if we put our mind to it.
Many people complain they cannot find this or that but if you really are looking you probably will find it.

You guys did not give Mexico a chance, it is obvious that if you ever move to Mexico you should look at a place like Chapala where they are many foreigners and many shops and where it is easier to find US items. (By the way some of the villages have cobblestones as well and so do many quaint places in Europe so stay in the US)

You may think you would like Mexico but really you are looking at the wrong country. Find a place in the States where you and take short vacations to Mexico.
We've already been contacted by a very nice member here who informed us of all the bazaars and garage sales in the Chapala area where many expat items can be found for a discount. Very informative and exactly what my wife hoped for. Thanks to her for the last PM which made us laugh with her description of daily life.

I've given Mexico many chances including having lived on the border for years. Before you tell me that the border isn't Mexico believe me I know. But it's an indication of my determination. No one forced me to move there. And I loved San Miguel and would be content wandering through it's streets as well as other cities in the region the rest of my life. But I want to keep my wife happy. I personally don't need the shopping and am content with reading, walking, surfing the 'net, and a little tv.
 

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I would not say the border is not Mexico it is just one aspect of Mexico. Chapala is another aspect of it some people love it and some hate it, good thing otherwise everyone would end up in the same place.

The you I used was a plural like You all.
 

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Van, because you did wait till 51 to marry, it may be a little more challenging to deal with the (sometimes HUGE) compromises that marriage requires.

As a person who was also previously married to a jerk, I know that when I started dating my dear husband, I was particularly adamant that I not give in too easily. Whether you, personally, have given MX, in all its crazy, wonderful diversity, a decent chance is irrelevant. Right now, for her own reasons, your wife is not happy with the thought of living there.

Perhaps a year or two, or even a decade, of living in the US, and visiting, regularly, will convince her otherwise. Life is long; so, ideally, is marriage. You are recently married, yes? In not that long a time, if you both approach with the goodwill that you seem to have, you will have moved, both of you, closer to a place where compromise doesn't feel like giving in, and where "agreeing to disagree" is the best way to move on from a disagreement.

I say that as a person who tends to be VERY black and white about issues, and to want every.single.detail tied down ahead of time. I've had to let my control of situations relax, and understand that it's just not possible for two people to want the same thing in every situation, nor to believe the same thing, either.

The rewards are great. Moving forward into the future, I know that, even though my husband may not be 100% on board with my vision for our retirement, he will at least entertain the thought. And that's because he knows that I will do the same for him.
 

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Van, because you did wait till 51 to marry, it may be a little more challenging to deal with the (sometimes HUGE) compromises that marriage requires.

As a person who was also previously married to a jerk, I know that when I started dating my dear husband, I was particularly adamant that I not give in too easily. Whether you, personally, have given MX, in all its crazy, wonderful diversity, a decent chance is irrelevant. Right now, for her own reasons, your wife is not happy with the thought of living there.

Perhaps a year or two, or even a decade, of living in the US, and visiting, regularly, will convince her otherwise. Life is long; so, ideally, is marriage. You are recently married, yes? In not that long a time, if you both approach with the goodwill that you seem to have, you will have moved, both of you, closer to a place where compromise doesn't feel like giving in, and where "agreeing to disagree" is the best way to move on from a disagreement.

I say that as a person who tends to be VERY black and white about issues, and to want every.single.detail tied down ahead of time. I've had to let my control of situations relax, and understand that it's just not possible for two people to want the same thing in every situation, nor to believe the same thing, either.

The rewards are great. Moving forward into the future, I know that, even though my husband may not be 100% on board with my vision for our retirement, he will at least entertain the thought. And that's because he knows that I will do the same for him.
I've never been married and at my age (I turned 68 this past summer), I doubt I ever will. But if a really special guy comes my way, and I pop the question, I'll keep your wise words in mind. Thanks for this excellent advice!
 

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I've never been married and at my age (I turned 68 this past summer), I doubt I ever will. But if a really special guy comes my way, and I pop the question, I'll keep your wise words in mind. Thanks for this excellent advice!
I just turned 65, and have exactly the same thing to say as Isla Verde.
 

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If serious shopping, U.S. style, is your wife's favorite activity..........there's not much hope here.

However, the Lake Chapala area is a good place to start out in Mexico...and why not bring the old dogs, too? It's nice and warm for them in the endless sunshine.

Plenty of charity-run thrift stores, essentials shopping and it's a short trip to world class shopping in Guadalajara. In fact, our local Red Cross runs a bus over to the various large malls on a regular basis for those who don't want to drive. People spend the day shopping and there's plenty of room below the bus for the purchases.

Yes, learning Spanish is a good idea, but in some areas like Lake Chapala, people can get by without total fluency since many Mexicans running businesses also speak some English.

What is essential is that both of you want to make the move.
 
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