Smeg was/is right

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Smeg was/is right


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Old 11th March 2020, 05:15 PM
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Default Smeg was/is right

Lol, there, I said it. I'm all but done with being in this country. So there you go, I was one of those people who came in here with the best intentions...even knowing from this forum how difficult it can be (being told that). But I tried, I really did. I'm just fed up. "J'en ai marre / je n'en peux plus "... whatever one says. France won! It broke me down. I have no idea how refugees and people who are forced to stay here due to wars back home or whatever here without a choice make do. Or maybe they don't.

Anyway .... I can't believe how much my attitude has changed, and this certainly wasn't just an overnight change or one thing...rather an accumulation and me finally admitting that "j'en ai marre." I haven't really planned out my personal "Frexit" yet...but my original plan was to attempt to stay and work here more or less at least for a while, etc, see if it can work. But I've just decided I'm tired of this "continue to struggle and struggle with the goal of seeing if it might work one day" mode. Like, why. Why keep struggling when there is another country where I could find jobs/etc much easier and at least I sort of understand how things work. For those who may not be "au courant," I've been attempting the university system, going on my third year now, totally all in French, not married, no relatives here, no roots, no help, no one I know haha... etc etc.

Sorry to be so negative but more and more I just laugh to myself thinking of Smeg and his "harbinger of doom" wisdom on these boards.

I don't know exactly what takeaways I have. I still think France is a great place to visit and Paris will always hold a place in my heart. To visit. Haha. And also, maybe this country is easier if one is already half-French or has French relatives or ... or maybe it's easy for people who are rich and retired and thus require minimal involvement with all the "systems" here (jobs, school, whatever). Idk. Or maybe it's just me, even with best intentions...I've found it's just not worth the fight.

So yeah, 10/10 I'd recommend France as a place to go/visit/stay for the short-term, even a year. Maybe even two. * thumbs up * But hardcore "living" here ... I don't know anymore. So, Smeg, You never tried to convince or un-convince me, but even my (fairly) level-headed self (as in, knowing I had a mountain in front of me) has become burnt out.

I'd still never dissuade someone who wants to try. It's not the same case for all. Just, bon courage haha

Also stay safe from the lil Covid virus boo everyone

EDIT: Oh and Bev, kudos to you for having 'stuck it out' so long lollll
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Old 11th March 2020, 06:04 PM
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I have wondered why you have been so silent lately. But, really France didn’t win and you didn’t lose. If you have learned anything during your time here you are a winner regardless of where you go next.
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Old 11th March 2020, 06:27 PM
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So sorry it has not worked out for you Soleil, especially given all the effort you have put in. Good luck for the future and we'd love to hear from you from time.

(Have thought about you often, but didn't want to PM because I didn't want to disrupt you, given all you had on your plate)

On the bright side, you know you have given it your all, finding that it is not for you is not a negative.

What about the rets? Obviously you did the right thing in choosing what does not have a long life.

Hugs
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Old 11th March 2020, 06:32 PM
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EH, I was already looking at what international flights allow them (rats) in the cabin lol and found at least one that leaves from CDG, miraculously. Anyway.... I don't have an immediate plan to leave, I'm not quite sure when it'll be...maybe I'll stick it out another year, (or two, at the longest haha), maybe not. I'm still assessing it. But mentally, within the past three weeks, I've more or less decided not to pursue attempting to live here longer term. Just how much longer I stay exactly remains to be seen lol. But thanks. And you can PM if you want, it just depends on if I see it or not right away (shh).

And yes, I've definitely learned A LOT that I can take back with me. Whoo buddy. Boy howdy. All that. A lot.


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Old 11th March 2020, 07:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SoleilCouchant View Post
EH, I was already looking at what international flights allow them (rats) in the cabin lol and found at least one that leaves from CDG, miraculously. Anyway.... I don't have an immediate plan to leave, I'm not quite sure when it'll be...maybe I'll stick it out another year, (or two, at the longest haha), maybe not. I'm still assessing it. But mentally, within the past three weeks, I've more or less decided not to pursue attempting to live here longer term. Just how much longer I stay exactly remains to be seen lol. But thanks. And you can PM if you want, it just depends on if I see it or not right away (shh).

And yes, I've definitely learned A LOT that I can take back with me. Whoo buddy. Boy howdy. All that. A lot.
Wow, and here was I about to post that I advise you to go ASAP. That said, if you can stick it out another 6 months or a year, all well and good. (Bloody virus!)

But I think that at least your accommodation is better than what you had in that hole that goes by the name of Poitiers

France is very, very hard for those of limited means, let alone for someone of limited means who is trying to pursue study in a language that is not their own and is not the easiest (though heck, you seem to have got on top of that ) Paris is for the comfortably off, unless it's not a permanent thing (like your original stay here). Saw shocking figures yesterday about SDF deaths last year, average age 50, and certainly not all refugees, like a woman with a " year old living in her car. Not forgetting the figures are just the known figures, many people in difficulty are discovered to have died long after the fact. And IMHO it's getting worse.

You know why I wrote 'rets'


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Old 11th March 2020, 07:48 PM
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Originally Posted by SoleilCouchant View Post
For those who may not be "au courant," I've been attempting the university system, going on my third year now, totally all in French, not married, no relatives here, no roots, no help, no one I know haha... etc etc.
Together we're stronger. I rage against the French machine but what buoys me up is my network of friends and family. I remember you posting that you were essentialy a hermit (was that right?) - so what you have achieved in 3 years is a stunning victory. The curtain goes down on you with a thunder of applause, Soleil!
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Old 11th March 2020, 08:17 PM
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I had thought that your silence meant that you no longer needed the forum and were happily living your French life as you had wanted to.

I am very sad that this is not the case and that you are thinking of moving on. In what ways has France not lived up to your expectations?

Whatever you decide to do next I wish you all the best and hope that you will eventually be able to look back on your "French years" with, if not pleasure, satisfaction.


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Old 11th March 2020, 08:20 PM
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Care to elaborate here on your reasons for coming to the end of your rope?

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Old 11th March 2020, 08:54 PM
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EDIT: Oh and Bev, kudos to you for having 'stuck it out' so long lollll
Don't think I haven't hit the wall any number of times - at least in my earlier years here. But the key thing is that you've taken a decision, so things will definitely go smoother from this point out. It's taking that decision ("should I stay or should I go?") that is so difficult.

Hey, nothing you learn ever goes to waste. Some day you'll find out what you really learned from putting up with all the guff here in France as long as you did. And you'll be amazed at how useful your experience will ultimately have been for whatever path you ultimately take.

Don't be a stranger. Keep us posted on your plans and where you are and where you are headed next. I've been thinking of you (as others here have said) but figured you were buried in school or work or whatever. We've missed you.

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Old 11th March 2020, 09:06 PM
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... It's taking that decision ("should I stay or should I go?") that is so difficult....
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