Am I kidding myself on?

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Am I kidding myself on?


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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 3rd May 2009, 10:15 PM
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Default Am I kidding myself on?

Every post I have read in the past week or so seems to be negative about life in OZ. From the education system, through to difficulty making friends, Aussies lack of a sense of humour, no culture, dark too early at night, house prices, the employment situation, you get my drift.
Now I'm sure that these are genuine concerns for the people involved. My question is, "Am I kidding myself on about a move out there?"
I've always wanted to move out. My dad served in Sydney as a Royal Marine during the war and loved it (OZ that is , not the war. I think my dad was a closet hippy without the drug taking!!) He & my mam planned to move out in the 50s, but due to family commitments, decided against it. My big sis moved out in 1978 & during the 90s I was out a total of 6 times to visit. Totally loved it. The Aussie attitude to life, the weather, the people were so friendly. Brash but friendly.
I am now starting to wonder, am I remembering it all through rose tinted Dame Edna specs? I was single & in my 20's then. Now happily married with 2 kids, I've just turned 40.
Are there any successful emigration stories out there? If so, remind me please of why I fell in love with OZ. Or has the big slapper changed that much in 10yrs that I woudn't recognise her now!!?


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Old 3rd May 2009, 11:04 PM
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Hi there,

All I can say is that Australia is not for everyone. The same would be the same for the US, Germany, Singapore, Scotland. It's goes down to the individual person. There will always be posts on here about why people don't like it and want to go back, which is good as it gives a balance. But I have to say that the main majority enjoy life here.

Some things here drive me crazy. The way people drive, the lack of good service in some restaurants, the telly, internet etc. But I could say that about the UK too. My OHs mantra is "Australia is not England with sunshine", which I think this is where some people go wrong, their expectations are too high (whichever country they are from). They think it's going to be some sort of Eutopia, and it isn't.

Personally,I love it here and barring any cataclysmic circumstances, we are here to stay. I love the weather, the flora/fauna, the landscapes, the people .... oh and whilst on the subject of people, it's down to you to make friends - if you've got school age children, you'll make friends quickly. It's down to you to put yourself out and talk to people. Karen has said many times that joining clubs etc is a very good way of making friends. I really don't understand about the not making friends thing, I guess if you're not happy here and you've maybe got a negative attitude, people will sense it.

Dolly

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Old 3rd May 2009, 11:13 PM
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Users Flag! Originally from england. Users Flag! Expat in australia.
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Remember that when people feel bad about a place they tend to see only the negative and not the positive at all.

Once people have moved to Australia they can often be busy or sometimes (incorrectly in my opinion) don't think they need this forum any more so we may not hear from them again. Or maybe they think they have nothing to contribute - which is far from the truth.

People who think that Oz will be like their 'home' country (without realising that Australia is now their home country) will not be happy here. People need to adapt since Australia won't change overnight.

I fell in love with Australia and the people the first time we came out there for a holiday. I loved the wide open spaces (you don't get that much in South London ), the friendly people, the climate, the work life balance.

We had travelled around quite a bit and we'd never met such friendly people. Okay people may not be so friendly in the bigger cities but that can be the same everywhere. However I've found that even in the big cities if you start talking to a stranger you can get a conversation going.

When we moved here we really focused on what we wanted and what we were prepared to do for it. It really was a new life for us. In the UK we spent hours in traffic jams or working abroad and only seeing each other at weekends. In the evening we were too tired to do anything and so never became a part of the community even though we had lived in one place for 10 years.

So we decided what we wanted. A beach house would have been nice but we decided against that so we could invest the money and have a better lifestyle. We choose somewhere not too big and not too small since we didn't want to live in a city.

We had the luxury of touring around Australia but people can still find out loads of info through the internet and forums like this one.

I investigated all the clubs in the areas we were thinking of moving and once we moved I checked them out. I've found that Aussies won't necessarily come to you but if you get yourself out there they'll make you welcome. You do have to have a sense of humour about yourself (I'm called a Pom and usually introduce myself as that first now ) and give as good as you get.

We moved here in July 2007. I made sure that my parents could use Skype before we moved so we could see each other and that has helped a lot. Not once have I missed the UK but I have missed family and friends. Skype can't replace a hug.

We genuinely love it here and do not think about going back to the UK. We're in our mid-40's by the way but we don't have any kids.

I didn't think that we were doing anything special, we just wanted to be part of the community and we've achieved that and more.

Do you still have to pay bills? Yes.
Does the government drive me crazy sometimes? Yes
Did those things drive me crazy in the UK? YES

Is the cost of living higher than expected? Yes
Australia is far away from Europe / USA and usually quite expensive for flights (there are flight reductions at present).

The recession is affecting here too - maybe not as great as some other places but it's still here.

Would I leave here and go back to the UK? NO.

This is now my home and I love it here.

Regards,
Karen

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Old 3rd May 2009, 11:40 PM
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Users Flag! Originally from usa. Users Flag! Expat in australia.
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I'd say you'd have a good chance of doing well here. You've been here six times, two important people in your life live here or loved living here (Dad and Sis). So if you're similar to them all indications are you'd like it here.

The first year is a wash, you spend half of it just setting up and getting used to the differences, and only after that do you start doing the things that you like.

But you have to be open to change. I don't get the shopping or diversity of restaurants from back home, I certainly miss my parents and extended family (living here almost 6 yrs here now) and they have visited on average every 18 months.

But AU is my 'home' now, my wife would live nowhere else for more than a few years (and believe me I've asked her every few months if she's interested). Her family is here and she is comfortable in life and career here.

And one of the decisions I made before I moved was, if I had to stay here a lifetime could I do it? and that came out as a yes (and that's why I never considered Europe or the Middle East).

Quote:
Originally Posted by NELBHOY View Post
Every post I have read in the past week or so seems to be negative about life in OZ. From the education system, through to difficulty making friends, Aussies lack of a sense of humour, no culture, dark too early at night, house prices, the employment situation, you get my drift.
Now I'm sure that these are genuine concerns for the people involved. My question is, "Am I kidding myself on about a move out there?"
I've always wanted to move out. My dad served in Sydney as a Royal Marine during the war and loved it (OZ that is , not the war. I think my dad was a closet hippy without the drug taking!!) He & my mam planned to move out in the 50s, but due to family commitments, decided against it. My big sis moved out in 1978 & during the 90s I was out a total of 6 times to visit. Totally loved it. The Aussie attitude to life, the weather, the people were so friendly. Brash but friendly.
I am now starting to wonder, am I remembering it all through rose tinted Dame Edna specs? I was single & in my 20's then. Now happily married with 2 kids, I've just turned 40.
Are there any successful emigration stories out there? If so, remind me please of why I fell in love with OZ. Or has the big slapper changed that much in 10yrs that I woudn't recognise her now!!?

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Old 4th May 2009, 12:37 AM
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Dolly, kaz101, amaslam, a mighty thanks for your thoughts & musings.
The time you've taking to reply is much appreciated. You've lifted my spirits somewhat!! God bless.

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Old 4th May 2009, 01:53 AM
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I have a couple of thoughts on this matter.

1. People going through culture shock need to vent, this is the place for it.

2. Misery loves company.

People who are unhappy will actively seek out those who feel the same. Happy people don't go searching the internet for other happy people to talk about their happiness.

I used to live in Japan and if you go to the expat forum there (try <snip>if you are curious) you will find lots of people moaning and *****ing about Japan saying almost similar things as the people complaining about Australia!


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Old 4th May 2009, 03:57 AM
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I was open minded coming here, i was very happy, i had no jumped up expectations (i knew it WOULDN'T be better than home), it doesnt matter if you have school going kids (all the mothers are BORING here)... i have made aussie friends here but they just dont get it, and too be honest i know if you stay here for 2 years or so you turn into an aussie and i'm just not willing to risk that, or put that infliction on my kids (sorry but thats the truth)...
On the other hand i would've loved to haved toured here when i was in my twenties, i would've really loved it
Even a south african mother here that i have befriended - of all the places she has lived in the world (on 4 continents) this is by far the worst (according to her).... she hates the "Stupid Schools" the People, the fakeness, all the stuff that have turned me off. if you talk about it privately to people Nelbhoy you will find that alot are unhappy but just not posting it here..

3 weeks left cant wait, longest 3 weeks of my life....
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Old 4th May 2009, 09:05 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IrishAngel View Post
I was open minded coming here, i was very happy, i had no jumped up expectations (i knew it WOULDN'T be better than home), it doesnt matter if you have school going kids (all the mothers are BORING here)... i have made aussie friends here but they just dont get it, and too be honest i know if you stay here for 2 years or so you turn into an aussie and i'm just not willing to risk that, or put that infliction on my kids (sorry but thats the truth)...
On the other hand i would've loved to haved toured here when i was in my twenties, i would've really loved it
Even a south african mother here that i have befriended - of all the places she has lived in the world (on 4 continents) this is by far the worst (according to her).... she hates the "Stupid Schools" the People, the fakeness, all the stuff that have turned me off. if you talk about it privately to people Nelbhoy you will find that alot are unhappy but just not posting it here..

3 weeks left cant wait, longest 3 weeks of my life....
You make such wild generalisations and are so insulting to the Australians that I'm actually surprised that you've made any friends here.

I belong to a local skilled migrant group (over 300 people) and we have open and frank discussions about Australia, UK, South Africa and other places and I've still not come across anyone with your negativity about Australia.

Regards,
Karen

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Old 4th May 2009, 11:02 AM
 
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Well, I like it! My husband and I have lived all over the world (almost!) and of course, everywhere has its drawbacks but on balance Australia has got to be one of the best places to live in the world. It does take a while to make friends and settle in anywhere but that is part and parcel of the adventure of setting up a new life abroad. After all, if you were happy with the status quo, why not just stay put.

It sound as if you are ready for a change and are going into it fully aware of the pros and cons and I wish you good luck with all your travel plans!

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Old 4th May 2009, 01:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kaz101 View Post
You make such wild generalisations and are so insulting to the Australians that I'm actually surprised that you've made any friends here.

Regards,
Karen

Well dont be surprised at all Karen because you DONT know me and i am a very nice person and such fun to be around..... i have a huge network of friends (not that i need to justify my discontent with Australia to YOU) I DONT like Australia and i am passing on my experiences to those wishing to make the same trek to the order side of the world (as we have done BEFORE them), and most people should be happy to know that Australia is NOT a great place to live for alot of Expats, especially those of us who have a massive network of friends on the other side of the world and those of us who are used to having a FUN social life etc etc...... I can make friends anywhere but here i really cant be bothered as i have not met many interesting aussies to be honest that i would choose to be friends with (apart from some Irish here).... and to add to that - i'm not that desperate to befriend people that do not interest me....

Regards

Paula
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