I'm an American living in NYC. My boyfriend is Scottish and is living in NYC too. We met in London 3.5 years ago (where I lived for a year) and luckily 2 years ago he was able to get a work visa and come to the states. We have been very happy living here and dating for 3.5 years now.

However,I just turned 28 and I am starting to feel the pressure from my family on where our relationship is gonig: are we are going to get married, where will we live, will we raise kids in the US or UK and will I be able to cope with that? I admit, it's been on my mind for a while too... but I simply don't know what to do. I dont think my boyfriend does either.

My boyfriend always talks about going back to the UK. He is happy here for now but in about 1.5-2 years, he wants to go back to either London or Edinburgh. I love the UK but am petrified that if I go with him, I am going to miss my family and that I won't be able to cope well. I had a hard time coping being in a new city and country when I first moved to London but by the time my one year was up there, I didn't want to leave London. So sometimes I think I could handle it again... but the question is, can I handle it forever? I know my boyfriend would prefer not to return to the states again.

I am close with my family though, and my older sister has two little kids. I am afraid my children (when I have them) won't grow up knowing their cousins if I move to the UK permanently. My friends tell me its not a big deal, that my family is only a 7 hour flight away (from London to NYC or DC) and that my boyfriend is wealthy enough that I might not even have to work. I could take an entire summer off with the kids and be home in the states with my family. But my boyfriend and I worry about down our future the road - what happens if we do have kids but end up getting divorced? It sucks to think about it but its a reality that it is very common these days. I don't know how I would handle raising kids as a divorcee and living in another country away from my family.

Perhaps I am over thinking things. Perhaps I should just continue dating him for the next 2 years until we absolutely have to make a decision on what to do (get married and move to the UK or break up). He does not want to stay here forever. But, I can't help but feel I might be wasting the next 2 years of my life if I don't make a decision now.

Has anyone experienced moving permanently to the UK and raising a family there? got any advice? I could really use it.

Thanks.